August 25, 2018 – davidbruceblog #2

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David Bruce: William Shakespeare’s 3 HENRY VI: A Retelling in Prose — Act 3, Scene 1

— 3.1 —

In a rural area in the north of England, two gamekeepers carrying crossbows were talking.

The first gamekeeper said, “Under this thickly grown thicket, we’ll shroud and hide ourselves, for through this glade the deer will soon come, and in this covert we will make our hiding place and choose the best of all the deer.”

“I’ll stay higher up the hill, so both of us may shoot,” the second gamekeeper said.

“That cannot be,” the first gamekeeper said. “The noise of your crossbow will scare the herd of deer, and so my shot will be lost. Here we both will stand, and we will aim at the best deer. So that the time shall not seem tedious, I’ll tell you what befell me on a day in this same place where now we intend to stand.”

The second gamekeeper looked up and said, “Here comes a man; let’s wait until he has passed by.”

King Henry VI, disguised and carrying a prayer book, was the man the second gamekeeper had seen.

King Henry VI said, “From Scotland I have stolen, purely out of love, to greet my own land with my wistful sight. No, Harry, Harry, it is no land of yours. Your place is filled, your scepter has been wrung from you, and the balm with which you were anointed has been washed off. No bending knee will call you Caesar now, no humble petitioners will press forward to speak to you and ask you for justice. No, not a man comes to you for redress of wrongs, for how can I help them, when I cannot help myself?”

The first gamekeeper said, “Aye, here’s a deer whose skin’s a gamekeeper’s fee. This is the former King; let’s seize him.”

Gamekeepers received the skin and head of a deer in payment for their services.

“Let me embrace you, sour adversity,” King Henry VI said, “for wise men say it is the wisest course.”

“Why do we linger?” the second gamekeeper said. “Let us lay hands on him.”

“Wait awhile,” the first gamekeeper said. “We’ll listen a little longer.”

King Henry VI said, “My Queen and son have gone to the King of France to seek aid, and I hear that the great commanding Earl of Warwick has also gone thither to request the French King’s sister-in-law as a wife for Edward. If this news is true, then, the labor of my poor Queen and son is only lost, for Warwick is a subtle orator and King Louis XI is a Prince soon won with moving words.

“However, by this second point — King Louis XI is a Prince soon won with moving words — Margaret may win him, for she’s a woman to be much pitied. Her sighs will make an assault on his breast. Her tears will pierce into a marble heart. The tiger will be mild while she mourns, and even a cruel tyrant such as the Roman emperor Nero will be affected by remorse when he hears her complaints and sees her brinish tears.

“Yes, but she’s come to beg, while Warwick has come to give. Margaret, on the French King’s left side, will beg for aid for me, Henry. Warwick, on his right side, will ask for a wife for Edward — a good marriage for the French King’s sister-in-law.

“Margaret will weep and say that her Henry has been deposed. Warwick will smile and say that his Edward has been formally installed as King of England.

“She, poor wretch, will be able to speak no more because of grief, while Warwick will tell the French King about Edward’s claim to be King of England. Warwick will smoothly pass over the wrong that Edward has done in claiming the crown and he will put forth arguments of mighty strength, and in conclusion he will win the King of France away from Margaret with the promise of a good marriage for his sister-in-law, and who knows what else he will say to strengthen and support King Edward IV’s place on the throne.

“Oh, Margaret, thus it will be, and you, poor soul, will then be forsaken because you went forlorn to the King of France!”

The gamekeepers came out of hiding.

The second gamekeeper said, “Tell us who you are who talks of Kings and Queens.”

King Henry VI said, “I am more than I seem, and less than I was born to. I am a man at least, for less I should not be. Men may talk of Kings, and so why not I?”

The second gamekeeper said, “Yes, but you talk as if you were a King.”

“Why, so I am, in my mind, and that’s enough,” King Henry VI said.

“But, if you are a King, then where is your crown?” the second gamekeeper asked.

“My crown is in my heart, not on my head,” King Henry VI said. “My crown is not decorated with diamonds and jewels from India, nor is it to be seen. My crown is called contentment: It is a crown that Kings seldom enjoy.”

The second gamekeeper said, “Well, if you are a King crowned with contentment, your crown of contentment and you must be contented to go along with us, for we think that you are the King whom King Edward IV has deposed, and we his subjects sworn in all allegiance will apprehend you as his enemy.”

“Haven’t you ever sworn and broken an oath?” King Henry VI asked.

“No, I never have, and I will not now,” the second gamekeeper said.

“Where did you dwell when I was King of England?”

“Here in this country, where we now remain,” the second gamekeeper replied.

“I was anointed King at nine months old,” King Henry VI said. “My father and my grandfather were Kings, and you were sworn true subjects to me. Tell me, then, haven’t you broken your oaths?”

“No, for we were your subjects only while you were King,” the first gamekeeper said.

“Am I dead?” King Henry VI said. “Don’t I breathe as a living man? Ah, simple men, you know not what you swear!”

He picked up a feather from the ground and said, “Look as I blow this feather from my face, and look as the air blows it to me again; the feather obeys my wind when I blow, and yields to another wind when it blows, commanded always by the greater gust. Such is the lightness and fickleness of you common men.

“But do not break your oaths, for of that sin my mild entreaty shall not make you guilty. Go where you will; the King shall be commanded. You two be the Kings: Command, and I’ll obey.”

The first gamekeeper said, “We are true and loyal subjects to the King of England: King Edward IV.”

“So would you be again to Henry VI, if he were seated on the throne as King Edward IV is,” King Henry VI said.

“We order you, in God’s name, and the King’s, to go with us to the officers of the peace,” the first gamekeeper said.

“In God’s name, lead,” King Henry VI said. “May your King’s name be obeyed, and whatever God wills, let your King perform, and whatever he wills, I humbly yield to.”

***

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David Bruce: Acting Anecdotes

English actor Stanley Holloway, who created the role of Eliza Doolittle’s father in My Fair Lady on Broadway, almost didn’t. He felt ignored during rehearsals, although he later realized that that was a compliment. The director and everyone else were concentrating on Rex Harrison, who was unknown—at that time—as a musical comedy star. Knowing that Mr. Holloway was an extremely competent actor, they left him to his own devices. Mr. Holloway called the play’s producer, Herman Levin, and asked to be released from his contract because no one was even saying hello when he arrived at the theater. Mr. Levin talked him out of immediately quitting and the next morning when Mr. Holloway arrived at the theater, everyone crowded around him to say hello. Even though Mr. Holloway knew that it was a put-up job, he felt better.

Hollywood actor Jimmy Stewart was made a Brigadier General in the Air Force Reserve, something which angered former Senator Margaret Chase Smith, who felt Mr. Stewart was unqualified. Discussing the promotion with such people as the then Secretary of the Air Force and the Air Force Chief of Staff, she asked why he should be made Brigadier General and was told he deserved it because of his performance in the movie Strategic Air Command. Senator Smith was aghast and said, “Then why you don’t make June Allyson a Brigadier General for playing the female lead in Strategic Air Command?”

Actor Robert Morley enjoyed changing the dialogue of the plays he appeared in. Once he appeared in Peter Ustinov’s Halfway Up the Tree. When Mr. Ustinov saw the play, he told Mr. Morley that it was “very funny.” Mr. Morley said, “That’s a relief, Peter. By this time I’m usually not talking to the author.” Mr. Ustinov replied, “What? Not even talking to yourself?” When Mr. Morley left the play and was replaced by actor Jimmy Edwards, Mr. Ustinov said, “I think Jimmy Edwards will be great. My only concern is what he will do to Bob Morley’s script.”

Jack Gilford worried about his children because none of their grandparents lived nearby, and he didn’t want them to be deprived of the experience of having loving grandparents. Being an actor, he readily solved the problem by becoming Grampa Max. Occasionally, he would turn into Grampa Max and tell his son, “C’mon, you vant to go to de park today? I’ll buy you a malted.” His son loved it, and years later, his senior project at film school was a 17-minute short titled Max, starring Jack Gilford as Grampa Max.

H. Chance Newton used to tell a story about a cousin of his who was suddenly called on to play the part of Osric in Hamlet. Being unfamiliar with the part, he put a copy of the play in Osric’s hat, planning to look up his dialogue as needed. Unfortunately, he came across a word he was unfamiliar with and hesitated during a speech. An audience member in the balcony, who had been observing the actor reading the copy of the play hidden in his hat, called out, “Spell it, old pal! We’ll tell you what it is!”

African-American diva Shirley Verrett learned a lot from performing various roles in opera. She debuted in opera in 1957 playing the title role in The Rape of Lucretia by Benjamin Britten, and in 1958 she played Irina in Lost in the Stars by Kurt Weill. She once said, “That showed me how I could change characters, being a virgin one night and two nights later a dance hall girl coming down the stairs with a split in my skirt. Everything I had learned in church went right down the drain!”

Professional actors tend not to think highly of amateur actors. An old professional tragedian and an old professional streetwalker were sitting side by side on a park bench. The tragedian turned to the streetwalker and said, “Ah, madame, what irony! The two oldest professions in the world—ruined by amateurs!”

Sir Peregrine Plinge once gave a bad performance as Macbeth, so he told a fellow actor, “Give me £5.” When the actor asked why, Sir Peregrine threatened, “Because if you don’t, I shall tell everybody that you played Macduff to my Macbeth.” (Sir Peregrine even went to the box office and said that the play was so bad he wanted his money back.)

There’s a story of an old actor who always talked about his days with the famous English actor and troupe-leader Sir Frank Benson. Once the old actor was asked if he had actually acted with Sir Frank. The old actor replied, “Not exactly—but I auditioned for him four times.”

Robert Montgomery once appeared in a radio program whose script called for him to go out into a blinding snowstorm. When the proper moment arrived, Mr. Montgomery threw some confetti into the air, creating his own snowstorm.

On the Japanese stage, men used to perform the roles of females. Onoe Baiko once told American dance pioneer Ted Shawn that his favorite roles on the stage were “ghosts, demons, and hysterical females.”

When George Gershwin died, he stipulated that his opera Porgy and Bess could not be performed by any but a black cast. This stipulation is usually observed in America, but it is not always observed in Europe.

Comedian Jack Oakie felt that there were three stages to the career of an actor in motion pictures: 1) “Who’s he?” 2) “There he is!” and 3) “Is he still around?”

George Bernard Shaw once complimented Sir Cedric Hardwicke by telling him, “You are my fifth favorite actor, the first four being the Marx Brothers.”

Actor Sir John Gielgud could cry on cue. When caricaturist Sam Norkin asked him how he did it, Sir John replied, “I think of something, but I won’t say what it is.”

Ralph Richardson once told Harry Andrews that just before acting on stage, he would walk around the set and touch things to help get in contact with the reality which he would very soon enact.

“The art of acting consists of keeping people from coughing.”—Sir Ralph Richardson.

***

David Bruce’s Smashwords Bookstore: Retellings of Classic Literature, Anecdote Collections, Discussion Guides for Teachers of Literature, Collections of Good Deed Accounts, etc.

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***

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Edgar Lee Masters: Felix Schmidt (Spoon River Anthology)

IT was only a little house of two rooms—
Almost like a child’s play-house—
With scarce five acres of ground around it;
And I had so many children to feed
And school and clothe, and a wife who was sick
From bearing children.
One day lawyer Whitney came along
And proved to me that Christian Dallman,
Who owned three thousand acres of land,
Had bought the eighty that adjoined me
In eighteen hundred and seventy-one
For eleven dollars, at a sale for taxes,
While my father lay in his mortal illness.
So the quarrel arose and I went to law.
But when we came to the proof,
A survey of the land showed clear as day
That Dallman’s tax deed covered my ground
And my little house of two rooms.
It served me right for stirring him up.
I lost my case and lost my place.
I left the court room and went to work
As Christian Dallman’s tenant.

***

“President Trump is what we get when we trust the rich to fix what they are complicit in breaking.” — Art of Quotation

“President Trump is what we get when we trust the rich to fix what they are complicit in breaking.” Anand Giridharadas, writer, journalist, author of Winners Take All: The Elite Charade of Changing the World

via “President Trump is what we get when we trust the rich to fix what they are complicit in breaking.” — Art of Quotation

Haiku: Stray Cat Strut — Glover Gardens

sometimes you just knowthat the other creature knowsyou’re from the same tribe This scruffy little tough guy is a Scottish charmer who knows a cat person when he sees one. An old Aberdonian tomcat who roams the streets of tiny (and also charming) Footdee, he has a whole Facebook group talking about him and worrying…

via Haiku: Stray Cat Strut — Glover Gardens

Muses Christ — It Just Popped Into My Head

What a boon to discover again the muse. Even though a city itself can’t provide the physical satisfaction of a human lover, there still is intimacy, this time, perhaps, with myself, and the music. It fills the soul. A little hoodoo in the rum and sweat down my neck.

via Muses Christ — It Just Popped Into My Head

Marigny, Marry Me — It Just Popped Into My Head

If my parents knew I aspired to be a degenerate writer, with a permanent seat at the local bar just off Decatur, coronet and trombone wafting in on a sticky August afternoon, they surely would never have agreed to pay for all that private school tuition. A waste of resources. When the closest thing to […]

via Marigny, Marry Me — It Just Popped Into My Head