davidbrucehaiku: will it get good soon?

audience-828584_1280

https://pixabay.com/photos/audience-crowd-people-persons-828584/

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WILL IT GET GOOD SOON?

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Will it get good soon?

We ask that about many

Books, movies, songs, poems

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NOTE: Fortunately, some works of art are good from beginning to end.

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Free eBook: YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIND: Volume 1 (pdf)

Free eBook: YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIND: Volume 2  (pdf)

Free eBook: YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIND: Volume 3 (pdf)

Free eBook: YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIND: Volume 4 (pdf)

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Music Recommendation: The Dollyrots — “Because I’m Awesome”

BRUCE’S RECOMMENDATION OF BANDCAMP MUSIC THAT YOU PROBABLY WON’T HEAR ON THE RADIO

Song: “Because I’m Awesome” from the album BECAUSE I’M AWESOME

Artist: The Dollyrots

Artist Location: Los Angeles, California

Artist Info: The Dollyrots are a female-fronted rock n’ roll band from California.

Their second studio album: Released March 13, 2007 

Written by Kelly Ogden and Luis Cabezas 

Kelly Ogden: bass, vocals 
Luis Cabezas: guitar, vocals 

Some Lyrics:

I’ve got the new style, uh huh 
And I’m walking right down your street 
I’m on your speed dial, you know 
The one everyone wants to meet 

I always tell you how great you dress 
It’s cause I’m fashionably socialized 
You’re smarter, better, no, the best 
Just look at me 

I’m a leader, I’m a winner, And I’m cleaner 
Cause I’m awesome 
I don’t need you cause I’m neato and I beat you 
Cause I’m awesome 
That’s right 

Price: $8 (USA) Album (the single cannot be purchased singly)

If you are OK with paying for it, you can use PAYPAL or CREDIT CARD

Genre: Pop Punk

Album: BECAUSE I’M AWESOME

The Dollyrots on Bandcamp

Dollyrots.com

David Bruce: The Coolest People in Comedy — April Fools Day, Audiences

April Fools Day

• Someone at Google Maps has a sense of humor. Close to April Fools Day, an editor of the website Nevada Thunder asked it for directions from Chicago, Illinois to Amsterdam, Netherlands. Step 20 said, “Swim across the Atlantic Ocean: 3,462 mi.”

Audiences

• British comedian David O’Doherty once performed in front of 40 people, 20 of whom were members of the Active Elderly Association, which meant that much of his audience were in their eighties. Unfortunately, his act was not meant for people in their eighties, so he was performing routines about iPhones and about spying on a naked lady doing aerobics when he was 12 years old. During intermission, he figured that all the old people would leave, but they were still present when he walked out for the second half of his act. He asked them, “Why are you still here?” One of the old people replied, “The bus doesn’t come to get us until 11.” He also used to do readings of children’s books in libraries. Ten minutes after he began reading one book, a small boy raised his hand and asked, “Does this get good soon?” Mr.O’Doherty says, “It was so profound. How many times — not just at a gig, but in a relationship or at a family get-together — have you wanted to raise your hand and ask that?”

• Stand-up comedian Kristen Schaal used to practice her act in front of an unusual audience: the cows on the Colorado farm where she grew up. She says, “I had time on my hands. I would perform in front of the cows. They never mooed. They never heckled. They were very polite. That’s how I learned to not expect anything from an audience.” Despite its being unusual, this kind of audience is good practice for real audiences, as Ms. Schaal points out, “I went back home recently, and I looked at the cows again and thought, ‘God, they have the same expression as audiences.’ Just expectant — they want something but they’re just, like, waiting. And they have no idea what they’re waiting for. After that training, I was set.”

• Comedian Larry Storch was doing stand-up comedy in Detroit at a time when Soupy Sales was doing a Detroit children’s show that was widely watched by adults. Mr. Storch heard that a local TV celebrity was in the audience, and he thought that the audience would like to know that, so he announced, “Ladies and gentlemen, there’s a guy named Soupy Sales in the audience who you might know and he’s sitting right over there. Let’s say hello.” Big mistake. The audience mobbed Soupy Sales, leaving nobody to listen to Mr. Storch’s act. Mr. Storch says, “It was embarrassing. They left the joint empty.”

• Early in his career, British comedian Danny La Rue appeared in a nightclub where the audience sat quietly throughout his performance. He thought that he had bombed completely and that his career was over, until he was informed that previously the audience had always ignored whatever comedian was performing so that they could talk amongst themselves. Getting the audience to listen to his performance was a tremendous achievement, and Mr. La Rue was on his way to a very highly paid career as a comedian.

• Fred Weintraub owned the Bitter End, a club where many comedians plied their art and became famous. He listened to the audience and let its reaction decide whether he should keep an act. If the audience hated an act, he kept it. If the audience loved an act, he kept it. If the audience members said after a performance, “That’s a nice act,” he dropped that act. According to Mr. Weintraub, the one thing he did not want was for an audience to be indifferent.

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Copyright by Bruce D. Bruce; All Rights Reserved

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THE COOLEST PEOPLE IN COMEDY

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Music Recommendation: The 427s — SURF NOIR (Album)

BRUCE’S RECOMMENDATION OF BANDCAMP MUSIC THAT YOU PROBABLY WON’T HEAR ON THE RADIO

Music: SURF NOIR (Album)

Artist: The 427s

Artist Location: Calgary, Alberta, Canada

Info: “The 427’s create instrumental surf rock influenced by ’60s surf music, spaghetti westerns, and film noir. Nominated for ‘Instrumental Recording of the Year’ at the Western Canadian Music Awards for their debut EP, their full-length spent seven weeks in the !earshot National Top 50 charts. Stay Gold, their follow-up, delves deeper into film noir themes while retaining their surf guitar roots.”

Price: Name Your Price (Includes FREE)

If you are OK with paying for it, you can use PAYPAL or CREDIT CARD.

Genre: Surf Instrumental

The 427s: SURF NOIR

The 427s on Bandcamp

David Bruce: The Coolest People in Comedy

Alcohol

• Some comedians take a drink to steady their nerves before performing. George Gobel once had Garry Moore as a guest onThe George Gobel Show. Mr. Moore visited Mr. Gobel in his dressing room before the live TV show started, and Mr. Gobel motioned to a bottle of whiskey and said, “Have a drink.” However, Mr. Moore replied, “Thanks, but I don’t believe I’ll have anything before the show. I’ll be happy to join you for a drink after the show.” Mr. Gobel could hardly believe what he was hearing: “Garry, do you mean to say you go out there all alone?”

• Comedian Bill Hicks used to do a lot of drugs, especially alcohol. Fortunately, after going on a late-night drug binge, then doing a radio show at 7 in the morning — during which he was funny although his heart was pounding instead of beating — he decided that he needed help. Mr. Hicks asked a friend who was currently peaceful although he had formerly been wild and crazy, “Are you going to one of those AA meetings today?” The friend replied, “I’ve been waiting three years for you to say that. There’s a meeting in 15 minutes. Let’s go.”

• While the movie The Captain Hates the Sea was being filmed on location, the atmosphere was that of a party, and expenses mounted quickly. Columbia studio head Harry Cohn wired the director, Lewis Milestone: “HURRY UP! THE COST IS STAGGERING!” Mr. Milestone sent back this telegram: “SO IS THE CAST.”

• In his home, W.C. Fields kept a chalkboard on which he listed his appointments. When comic writer H. Allen Smith visited him, Mr. Fields had listed, “Stay home and meditate on the follies of humankind. P.S. Get stiff.”

Animals

• As a small boy, Wally Cox owned a cat that was smarter than he was and smarter than the adult humans in his household. For example, like all house pets, this cat would sometimes be accidentally shut in a room with all the doors and windows closed. When that happened, the cat would meow, then wait. If that didn’t bring a human running to let the cat out of the room, then the cat would knock something small off a shelf or table onto the floor, then wait. If that didn’t bring a human running to let the cat out of the room, then the cat would knock something large off a shelf or table onto the floor, then wait. The bigger items made lots of noise, and soon a human would come running to let the cat out of the room. Once the cat was shut in the basement with lots of canning jars. This time, however, the humans thought that they would train the cat. No matter how many jars of canned goods the cat knocked onto the floor, the humans would NOT come running to let the cat out of the basement. The cat knocked a canning jar onto the floor, then another, and then another — until 32 canning jars were on the floor. The humans remained resolute, and did not come running to let the cat out of the basement. Then a truly major racket exploded in the basement, and the humans came running and opened the door to the basement. The cat came out of the basement — objective achieved — and walked haughtily away. This is what had happened. An ironing board was at the top of the basement stairs, and the cat had managed to knock it over so that it crashed down the basement stairs. After that experience, the humans were properly trained. Whenever the cat needed to be let out of a room or the basement, the humans came running — quickly.

• When Margaret Cho was in Tibet, she visited a dog monastery, which she describes as a temple for reincarnated monks — that is, monks who went astray during their human lives and who have come back as dogs. Ms. Cho remembers that the temple is quiet: The dogs do not bark, howl, or fight, and at the temple the major activity of both monks and dogs is quiet meditation. Visitors can feed the dogs pieces of dough, and the dogs wait in line for their turn to eat! Ms. Cho says, “When I think of Tibet, I remember the politeness of the dogs, pulling back their dog lips and ever so gently taking the food from my hand with their open teeth, not wanting to bite my hand accidentally, and then looking warmly into my eyes with a silent thanks.”

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Copyright by Bruce D. Bruce; All Rights Reserved

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THE COOLEST PEOPLE IN COMEDY

Buy the Paperback

Amazon Kindle

Smashwords