gentle breezes blow the many shades of green leaves swaying back and forth sky is muted blue bits of white clouds here and there seeming to stand still faster than a blink birds chase each other around squirrels search for nuts ©2021 Annette Rochelle Abentriple haiku 7/4 — Annette Rochelle Aben
• You’ve heard of the Cadbury bunny, haven’t you? The Cadbury Chocolate Works used to be owned by George and Elizabeth Cadbury, both Quakers. King George V and Queen Mary once visited the Cadburys, who took them on a tour. Mr. Cadbury took off his hat during the tour, but Queen Mary was worried about his catching cold, so she requested that he put his hat back on, but he declined. Queen Mary then said that she would ask her husband the King to tell him to put his hat back on, but Mr. Cadbury again declined to put on his hat. Mrs. Cadbury then said firmly, “George, put on your hat.” Mr. Cadbury — and King George V — put on their hats.
• During the Restoration in England, Dr. Robert South was preaching to Charles II when he noticed that several members of the congregation were sleeping through his sermon. Keeping his presence of mind, he called to one of the sleepers, “Lord Lauderdale, let me entreat you, rouse yourself; you snore so loud that you will wake the King.”
• Edwin Porter was a strict Methodist preacher who was active in Texas during the first half of the 20th century. As a strict preacher, he didn’t believe in having ragtime music played during the family’s musical Sunday afternoons, although love songs and of course gospel were fine. One day he asked his oldest daughter, Katie, to play something on the piano. Katie decided to play the newest ragtime hit, “Twelfth Street Rag,” but she told her father it was a new song titled “Love in My Heart.” Rev. Porter liked the new song so much that he asked his daughter to play it three times.
• Stand-up comedian Marc Weiner, creator of the finger puppets known as the Weinerettes, ran into some problems when he began to observe the Sabbath, which for Jews begins at sunset Friday. Of course, Friday evening is a big day for Gentiles to go to comedy clubs, and in observance of the Sabbath, Mr. Weiner declined to work then. Fortunately, some club owners are willing to work around his schedule.
• A Jewish man married a Gentile woman although his father advised him not to. Later, the man told his father that he had been right: “That woman will drive me to the poorhouse. The rabbi told her that it is a sin to do business on the Sabbath, and now she won’t let me open my store on Saturdays.” His father replied, “See. A Jewish man is a fool if he marries a Gentile.”
• While working as a stand-up comedian in Oklahoma, Jay Leno saw that many members of the audience had something written on the soles of their shoes. Later, he asked the promoter about it and discovered that a local preacher had told members of his congregation to write “Satan” on the soles of their shoes because just by walking around they could stomp out Satan.
• A Christian was caught backsliding, so his pastor told him, “When you are tempted, say, ‘Satan, get behind me!’” The backslider replied, “I do say that, but Satan says, ‘All right, I’ll get behind you. It doesn’t matter who is in front as long as we are both going in the same direction.’”
• Some people treat the Bible as a device of divination by opening it at random and pointing blindly to a verse, repeating the process as many times as necessary. Rolf E. Aaseng is very much against this practice. In teaching his Sunday School class, he has the students imagine that they try it and point first to Matthew 27:5 (“Judas … went off and hanged himself”), then imagine that they try it again and point to Luke 10:37 (“Jesus replied, ‘You go, then, and do likewise’”).
• Henry Cadbury, an early 20th-century scholar, professor, and Quaker wit, stayed away from telling risqué humor with one exception. Sometimes he told about staying in a hotel room in which a Bible had been placed. In the Bible was a listing of verses for various problems, including “Worried? See verse so and so. Troubled? See verse so and so. Lonely? See verse so and so.” After the listing for lonely, someone had written: “Still lonely? Call Mabel at 123-4567.”
Copyright by Bruce D. Bruce; All Rights Reserved
250 Anecdotes About Religion, Volume 2 — Buy
BRUCE’S RECOMMENDATION OF BANDCAMP MUSIC
Album: TIME & FATE
Artist: Ben Matchett
Artist Location: Hudson’s Hope, British Columbia
“Everyday we get to see the good, bad, ugly, and beautiful. I feel there is a song hiding in all of it.”
Price: $1 (CAD) for track; $7 (CAD) for eight-track album