At Stratford with William — The Cheesesellers Wife

From above I watch the story unfold Bask in dense poetry The pleasure of words and phrasing So pertinent to the action To the people laying out their very lives in front of us I laugh uproariously then Gasp as the knife plunges Hold my breath Knowing from schooldays the inevitable end But hoping this […]

via At Stratford with William — The Cheesesellers Wife

davidbrucehaiku: life is beautiful!



Cherry-blossom time!

Potential wives everywhere!

Life is beautiful!


Copyright by Bruce D. Bruce; All Rights Reserved


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David Bruce: William Shakespeare’s HENRY V: A Retelling in Prose — Act 3, Scene 4

— 3.4 —

The French had suffered a major defeat when Harfleur fell.

Katherine had been offered as a bride to Henry V, along with some Dukedoms, earlier, but the English King had rejected the offer and had invaded France. Now it looked as if Katherine might still marry Henry V and that he might become the King of France. Katherine decided to start learning English in a room of the French palace with the help of Alice, a gentlewoman who was somewhat older than she.

Katherine said, “Alice, tu as ete en Angleterre, et tu parles bien le langage.”

[Katherine said, “Alice, you have been in England, and you know the language well.”]

Alice replied, “Un peu, madame.”

[Alice replied, “A little, madame.”]

Katherine said, “Je te prie, m’enseignez: il faut que j’apprenne a parler. Comment appelez-vous la main en Anglois?”

[Katherine said, “Please, teach me the language. I need to learn it. What is the English for la main?]

Alice replied, “La main? Elle est appeleede hand.”

[Alice replied, “La main? It is called de hand.”]

Katherine said, “De hand. Et les doigts?”

[Katherine said, “De hand. And the fingers?”]

Alice replied, “Les doigts? Ma foi, j’oublie les doigts; mais je me souviendrai. Les doigts? Je pense qu’ils sont appeles de fingres; oui, del.”

[Alice replied, “Les doigts? By my faith, I have forgotten the English for les doigts, but I will remember. I think that they are called de fingres; yes, de fingres.”]

Katherine said, “La main, de hand; les doigts,de fingres. Je pense que je suis le bon ecolier; j’ai gagne deux mots d’Anglois vitement. Comment appelez-vous les ongles?

[Katherine said, “La main isde hand; les doigts isde fingres.I think that I am a good scholar; I have learned already two words of English. What do you call les ongles?”]

Alice replied, “Les ongles? Nous les appelonsde nails.”

[Alice replied, “Les ongles?We call them de nails.”]

Katherine said, “De nails. Ecoutez; dites-moi, si je parle bien: dehand, de fingres,etde nails.”

[Katherine said, “De nails. Listen, and tell me if I am speaking correctly: dehand, de fingres, and de nails.”]

Alice replied, “C’est bien dit, madame; il est fort bon Anglois.”

[Alice replied, “It is well said, madame; it is very good English.”]

Katherine said, “Dites-moi l’Anglois pour le bras.”

[Katherine said, “Tell me what is the English for le bras.”]

Alice replied, “De arm, madame.”

Katherine asked, “Et[And] le coude?”

Alice replied, “De elbow.”

Katherine said, “De elbow. Je m’en fais la repetition de tous lesmots que vous m’avez appris des a present.”

[Katherine said, “De elbow. I will now repeat all the words you have taught me up until the present.”]

Alice replied, “Il est trop difficile, madame, comme je pense.”

[Alice replied, “That is too difficult, madame, I think.”]

Katherine replied, “Excusez-moi, Alice; ecoutez: de hand, de fingres,de nails, de arma, de bilbow.”

[Katherine replied, “Excuse me, Alice, but you are wrong. Listen: de hand, de fingres,de nails, de arma, de bilbow.”]

Alice said, “De elbow, madame.”

Katherine said, “O, Seigneur Dieu, je m’en oublie! De elbow. Commentappelez-vous le col?”

[Katherine said, “Oh, Lord God, I forgot! De elbow. What do you call le col?]

Alice replied, “De neck, madame.”

Katherine said, “De nick. Et le menton?”

Alice replied, “De chin.”

Katherine said, “De sin. Le colis de nick; dementonis de sin.”

Alice replied, “Oui. Sauf votre honneur, en verite, vous prononcezles mots aussi droit que les natifs d’Angleterre.”

[Alice replied, “Yes. Saving your reverence, truly you pronounce the words as straight as do the natives of England.”]

Katherine said, “Je ne doute point d’apprendre, par la grace de Dieu,et en peu de temps.”

[Katherine said, “I have no doubt that I shall learn English, by the grace of God, and in only a short time.”]

Alice asked, “N’avez vous pas deja oublie ce que je vous ai enseigne?”

[Alice asked, “Haven’t you already forgotten what I taught you?”]

Katherine replied, “Non, je reciterai a vous promptement: de hand, defingres, de mails —”

[Katherine replied, “No, I shall repeat it for you right now: de hand, defingres, de mails —”]

Alice said, “De nails, madame.”

Katherine said, “De nails, de arm, de ilbow.”

Alice said, “Sauf votre honneur, de elbow.”

[Alice said, “If it please your honor, de elbow.”]

Katherine said, “Ainsi dis-je: de elbow, de nick, etde sin. Commentappelez-vous le pied et la robe?”

[Katherine said, “That’s what I said: de elbow, de nick, and de sin. What do you call le pied andla robe?”]

Alice replied, “De foot, madame; et[and] de coun.”

This shocked Katherine. The English word “foot” sounds similar to the French word “foutre,” which means “f**k.” Alice’s word “coun,” by which she meant the English word “gown,” sounds similar to the French word “con,” which means “c*nt.”

Katherine said, “De foot etde coun! O Seigneur Dieu! ce sont mots de son mauvais, corruptible, gros, et impudique, et non pour les dames d’honneur d’user: je ne voudrais prononcer ces mots devant les seigneurs de France pour tout le monde. Foh!Le foot etle coun! Neanmoins, je reciterai une autre fois ma lecon ensemble: de hand, de fingres, de nails, de arm, de elbow, de nick, de sin, de foot, de coun.”

[Katherine said, “De foot and de coun! Oh, Lord God! These words are evil, corrupting, gross, and shameless, and not for an honorable lady to use! I would not say these words in front of French gentlemen for the entire world. Oh! Le foot and le coun! Nevertheless, I will recite all of my lesson again: de hand, de fingres, de nails, de arm, de elbow, de nick, de sin, de foot, de coun.”

Alice said, “Excellent, madame!”

Katherine replied, “C’est assez pour une fois. Allons-nous a diner.”

[Katherine replied, “That is enough for one lesson. Let’s go to dinner.”]


Copyright by Bruce D. Bruce; All Rights Reserved


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David Bruce: Media Anecdotes

Some people whose photographs appear in such magazines as InStyle, In Touch, Life & Style, Star, OK!, and Us are not famous, which means that they have to work very hard at appearing in these magazines. One such person is Phoebe Price, who spends a lot of time and money going to parties at Cannes, the Emmys, the Grammys, and the Oscars. One of her tips for being photographed in expensive and skimpy clothing at such parties is this: “Say I find a Dolce & Gabbana dress, and I think it’s really hot and I think someone else [who is famous] might wear it. I’ll wear it so that it might get compared in a magazine.” Ms. Price even has an informant at Saks Fifth Avenue who tells her what celebrities are planning to wear to parties where the paparazzi will be around. Ms. Price also says that when the paparazzi have her in their sights, “I always do side angles and over-the-shoulder. I give them 15 to 20 looks.” Joel Stein, a humor columnist who interviewed Ms. Price for the Los Angeles Times, decided to try to get the paparazzi to take photographs of Cassandra, his wife. Mr. Stein announced to the paparazzi that Cassandra Barry was about to walk down the carpet to a party. Immediately, members of the paparazzi shouted, “Cassandra, up top!” As Cassandra gave the paparazzi side angles and over-the-shoulder looks, the cameras snapped, and she ended up giving the paparazzi 15 to 20 looks.

Musician Naomi Judd hosts a cable-TV talk show on Sunday mornings, and if she could have any guest she wanted, she would have Jesus as her guest. During a break while appearing on Larry King’s talk show, she asked him whom he would like to have as a guest. Mr. King replied, “God.” She then asked him what would be his first question. Mr. King replied, “I would ask Him if He had a Son.” Ms. Judd has long taken religion seriously. Her mother tells a story about when Naomi was a child. Her mother met Naomi’s Sunday-School teacher, who told her that she had to be extra prepared to teach her Sunday-School lessons because Naomi was sure to ask questions such as “’Would you explain that Immaculate Conception just one more time?” and “OK, how did He raise Lazarus from the dead?” As a young adult, she almost gave her mother a stroke when she told her mother that she had visited a Buddhist temple—as it happened, just to check it out. She also worked an extra shift as a young adult so she could buy the Time-Life series of books on the Great Religions.

Tabloid newspapers often don’t follow the rules that more established newspapers follow—getting readers can sometimes be regarded as more important than reporting truth. Robert Johnson, an assistant editor, said about the Hearst tabloid newspaper the Los Angeles Herald Express, “The paper was aimed at the underside of the community, the barely literate, the bored, the poor, the people who want to know about murders and UFO’s and sports results, and damn little else. It was just sloppy. No metro in America had more typos. We were embarrassed to tell people we worked there. It always crawled over any disaster because they were easy to cover.” The paper did have the first female editor of a major metropolitan newspaper, Aggie Underwood, who enjoyed creating flashy names for murder cases. One murder case featured a waitress who had been stabbed to death. Ms. Underwood dropped a white carnation on the waitress’ corpse so she could call the case “THE WHITE CARNATION MURDER.”

Punk rocker Patti Smith occasionally acted badly. Her second album, Radio Ethiopia, received mainly mediocre and bad reviews, and that put her on the defensive. At a press conference in London, a music reporter asked her why tickets for her tour weren’t selling. She screamed, “F*ck you! You’re a rag! Get out of here!” She also took food from a plate and threw it. Next she was asked, “Which Beatle newsreel are you acting now?” She responded by climbing on a table, kicking away any objects that were on it. She then told everyone, “I’m the field marshal of rock ’n’ roll! I’m f*cking declaring war! My guitar is my machine gun!” One of the journalists present was Julie Burchill, a young fan of Ms. Smith’s. She was horrified and in tears because of Ms. Smith’s actions. Later, Ms. Burchill wrote, “For a two-year-old it would have been a very impressive performance; from the Queen of Rock and Roll it was like watching God jerk off.”

When Kathryn Crosby—not yet married to Bing—was 18 years old, she had a chance to interview famous stars Bob Hope and Joan Fonteyn. Unfortunately, she nearly caused a disaster by asking Ms. Fonteyn how old she was. Fortunately, Mr. Hope smoothed things over by saying, “Making allowances for your youth and inexperience, we still can’t let you talk to a great star that way. Now, here’s what you should have asked.” Mr. Hope then asked Ms. Fonteyn a series of questions that both elicited the information needed for Ms. Crosby to write an interesting newspaper column and flattered Ms. Fonteyn at the same time. Ms. Crosby writes, “It was a gentle and instructive rebuke from a master craftsman, and I never forgot the lesson that it instilled. Months later, when the same callow teen-ager interviewed Bing for her paper, she was ready to snare a superstar and a husband with a far more subtle approach.”

Notre Dame football coach Knute Rockne once met writer Heywood Broun and told him, “I’m glad to know you, Broun. I often read your articles in the World.” This was a mistake because Mr. Broun had not written for the World for two years. Mr. Broun replied, “I’m glad to hear that. And by the way, that’s a great basketball team you have at Yale.”

Media representatives tend to always be present around such politicians and their wives as Al and Tipper Gore. In a comic protest, Tipper once soaked a few reporters with a water pistol.


Copyright by Bruce D. Bruce; All Rights Reserved


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Edgar Lee Masters: Thomas Ross, Jr. (Spoon River Anthology)

THIS I saw with my own eyes: A cliff-swallow
Made her nest in a hole of the high clay-bank
There near Miller’s Ford.
But no sooner were the young hatched
Than a snake crawled up to the nest
To devour the brood.
Then the mother swallow with swift flutterings
And shrill cries
Fought at the snake,
Blinding him with the beat of her wings,
Until he, wriggling and rearing his head,
Fell backward down the bank
Into Spoon River and was drowned.
Scarcely an hour passed
Until a shrike
Impaled the mother swallow on a thorn.
As for myself I overcame my lower nature
Only to be destroyed by my brother’s ambition.




Note by David Bruce: This dance is scary good.

KSYU: DANCER wearing sleeves

ANNA: DANCER with no sleeves

DARINA: WOMAN IN RED (One of the twins: See below)



MDCØV – k-pop dance cover team.


K-pop, for us, is an amazing phenomenon full of bright colors, excellent choreography, attracting its unusualness, opening up new sides of the music world.


The name of the group stands for quite simply, it consists of three words: Music Dance COVer.


►Date of the debut: 14.04.12 — April 14, 2012


►Group membership:

– Zakraynova Alena☆LEADER (June 25, 1994) — ALENA is KYOHYUN

– Drozdova Anastasia☆DANCER (18.05.93) — TWIN — ASYA (Long Hair)

– Drozdova Darina☆DANCER (18.05.93) — TWIN — (Short Hair)

– Anna Ermachenkova☆DANCER (04.10.93)

– Chudova Catherine☆DANCER (02.12.94) — KATE

– Maria Kruslava ☆DANCER (11/01/98)

– Ratnikova Polina☆MAKNAE (26.04.99) — YOUNGEST IN GROUP


– Antipova Xenia☆EX-DANCER (29.04.93) — XENIA is KSYU


►23.07.12 – 100 days from the date of the debut

►27.08.13 – 500 days from the date of the debut

►09.01.15 – 1000 days from the date of the debut

►23.05.16 – 1500 days from the date of the debut

►05.10.17 – 2000 days from the date of the debut